Intravenous, intertwined

Well. The weekend, at least, has been a happier place to be. By the grace of God (and, i think, after a protracted argument with God) i've engaged in a tiny bit of detox; and it's reeeeeeally nice. Had a really hard, full-body workout on fri. and went for about an hour run yesterday. And that was a nice surprise, 'cuz i went out for maybe a 20 or 30 min. run, and just felt so dang good i kept running. Made me remember why i like running. i'm pretty sure i've lost some weight as i didn't have the usual ankle/hip jarring session i usually have when i first go back to running. 'Course, that's because i have only tree-branch-like appendages left where once i had a lower body. But weight is weight, and less is good.

And for the last couple of days we've kept the ethanol consumption to nearly nil. It's amazing to me how used one can get to being toxic and feeling like crap all the time-- how adroit i am at shifting blame for a neverending bad mood onto fairly insignificant, mostly unrelated bits of bad luck; and can finally bring myself to open up a can of Job on God before i'll take a look at how poisoned and selfish and manipulative and self-pitying i've become. i'm sure i'm not done with that, i'm sure, but at least for a little while this weekend i've been shown that there exists a light outside the tunnel.

i think now we're gonna go to the climbgym. Still a hair chilly in the hinterlands to haul the kiddos to the rock, but they had a redpoint comp at the gym yesterday, and there should be a ton of new routes up. And Annie really wants to get to try out her new shoes. i'm gonna really try to stick to my one-hard-session-the-week pledge for a couple of weeks and see if i can heal some tendon enough to start training hard again. But a ton of 5.9s oughtn't count...